Embrace the Holgorsen Man Crush!


Hello, my name is Dwayne, and I suffer from “HMCS” also know has “Holgorsen Man Crush Syndrome.” It is true. Saying something aloud is almost cleansing and cathartic.  I can only imagine that would be my opening line at the local Morgantown “HMCS” chapter meeting.

My man crush started at the 22 second mark of the 3rd quarter of Oklahoma State’s shellacking of Arizona in the 2010 Alamo Bowl. With Oklahoma State up 33-10, the telecast revealed a camera shot of then offensive coordinator, Dana Holgorsen, slamming down Red Bulls on the OSU sideline. Priceless! It reminded me of the famous “Animal House” scene when Bluto grabbed the remains of the confiscated Jack Daniels and chugging it down on the lawn.  That’s focus. I wanted to party with guy.

and here’s another just for laughs:

The next man crush moment came when all the erroneous and “allegedly” planted (or passed for “journalism” by a scribe in a cheap suit) stories started to surface about Coach Holgorsen’s “alleged incident” at a local West Virginia casino.  Having personally lived in Las Vegas, I can say without certainty the Mardi Gras Casino & Resort is not a “Vegas-type casino” by any means of the imagination.  Let’s be honest and call it a “watering hole with gambling”. I haven’t been this outraged since Billy Blazejowski was banned from Atlantic City for throwing his watered down drinks on the dealer!  (By the way, if you haven’t seen the 80’s comedy classic, “Night Shift”, starring Michael Keaton and Henry Winkler and directed by Ron “Opie” Howard, do yourself a HUGE favor and rent it. You’ll thank me later.

Here’s a clip from the movie:

Come on, who amongst us have not drank too much and been asked to leave a party? If that’s the standard my entire fraternity would have been banned from this Casino at some point during my seven years in Morgantown!

The events at the Casino lead me to my next man crush moment. Thanks to our friend in Pittsburgh Colin Dunlap with the aid of reputable bloggers, including this website, Holgorsen waged an unplanned coup d’état that would have made Idi Amin blush with envy.  After allegations of public intoxication and rude and unseemly behavior, the accused successfully took over for the “alleged” accuser. Holgorsen was ushered in as the new head football coach of the WVU Mountaineers and his predecessor was shown the door. My personal sports hell, also known as the “Bill Stewart Era”, had come to a quick and welcomed end. How do you have such ugly allegations thrown at you and yet manage to get promoted? It’s brilliant! Not since Brantley Foster moved from the mailroom to the boardroom has ascension to the top been so rapid. (I just dropped another ‘80’s movie reference. Give up?

Here’s a clip:

Since then we’ve been treated to skydiving with State Troopers and preseason press conferences.  It is with great anticipation that the upcoming season and hanging 60 on Marshall in the opener will do nothing to diminish my man crush. Embrace the man crush and enjoy the season.

Let’s Go Mountaineers!