Fun With Yucky Chucky: More Coal Bowl BS


Once again, Cheap Suit Chuck Landon is at it, talking about Marshall and the “Coal Bowl.” This time, Chuck went a-politickin’ with the Coal Bowl, as we’ll see below. See, he has these grand ideas that state government should be involved with something as idiotic as the Coal Bowl. After the jump, if you will…

Enough already.
Yeah, enough Chuck already!

Enough campaigning. Enough promises. Enough political double-talk.
Holy sh*t, I’m actually agreeing with Cheap Suit Chucky for a change!

Let’s cut to the chase and examine the most important issue in the West Virginia gubernatorial primary elections Saturday.
Jobs? The economy? Coal?

Which is?
(see above)

The future of the Marshall-WVU football series, of course.
Oh wow, Chuck… that’s low, even for you. See, with gas around the $4/mark, food prices going up, jobs going overseas, record layoffs and unemployment, coal under fire, and other pressing issues, all your white-trash ass cares about is a GAME THAT SHOULD NOT EVEN BE PLAYED!

That’s why The Herald-Dispatch editorial board asked each candidate, “Should the MU-WVU football games continue?”
Simply because Huntington is doing well in every other category in this state!

Here are their answers and my analysis:

Arne Moltis: “Football games are good for business and maintains fun for all.”
Who the hell is this guy?

He’s trying to say yes without saying yes and avoid being labeled.
Chuck, don’t make assumptions. You know what they say about that, right? Makes an ass out of you and “UMPTION!”

Earl Ray Tomblin: “Yes, I support continuing the Coal Bowl. Friendly competition that showcases West Virginia’s two largest institutions of higher learning is good for the schools, their local economies and the state.”
Of course, he does… his buddy Joe started it!

That’s a strong answer.

Jeff Kessler: “Personally I would like to see it continue. However, I believe that it is a decision to be made by the athletic directors and departments of the respective universities and not a gubernatorial decision.”
Kessler gets it.

That’s a nice walk on the beach in flip-flops. Translation: I might be for it until I have to be against it to get elected.
Chucky’s just mad because Kessler didn’t say an answer that suited him.

John Perdue: “Yes, I believe Marshall and WVU should continue to play against each other, however the frequency of those games should be negotiated by the two universities.”
Dumbass. Dumb commercials. Funny accent.

That’s like dating, but still seeing other people. It’s not a rivalry if they don’t play every year.
NEWSFLASH: WVU/Marshall is NOT A RIVALRY! Get your head out of your ass, Chuck!

Natalie Tennant: “As the former Mountaineer mascot, I can tell you there is nothing quite like game day. When WVU plays Marshall, you get an incredible feeling of excitement throughout the state. West Virginians are dedicated fans and this game brings out the deep sense of pride and tradition from supporters of both universities.

“This rivalry pushes both of these schools to excellence, which happens not only on the football field, but also carries over to all the athletic programs, to the classroom and to our innovative research. The matchup represents the kind of healthy competition that moves West Virginia forward.”
Wait, what?

Is there an answer in there somewhere? I’m calling balderdash on this.
The only thing I call balderdash on is your writing, Chuck.

Rick Thompson: “I would like to see the game continue if it can produce revenue for both schools.”
Go back to makin commercials that show you pickin’-and-grinnin’.

Another yes without saying yes.

Betty Ireland: “While I thoroughly enjoyed attending last year’s game, I do not believe that this is an issue for the governor or Legislature. Both institutions have very capable athletic directors and presidents, and it clearly falls within their decision making responsibilities to decide what is in the best interest of their respective institutions concerning this issue.”
For once, Betty Ireland gets it.

Obviously, she’s a cheerleader, not a head coach. Mark her down as a “no.”

Bill Maloney: “I’d support whatever the fans and universities themselves think is best.”
Obviously, Bill, your current hometown’s university (WVU) does NOT support renewing this turkey shoot.

Sounds like a campaign button. I’m 4 U. I support what you support.
Chuck probably supports mandatory mullets, too.

Cliff Ellis. “No.”

Thanks for not wasting our time.
Don’t know who Cliff Ellis is, but I like his answer.

Larry Faircloth. “If it’s in the interest of both schools.”

Uh, Larry, you’re running for governor of the state not university president.
Faircloth has a good answer… if it’s in the interest of both schools. It’s not in WVU’s best interest.

Mark Sorsaia. “In my opinion, it is not the governor’s role to get involved in those kinds of decision-making. State government should allow university officials to run their own programs and scheduling.”

That’s a no.
Sorsaia gets it.

Mitch Carmichael. “Yes.”

Gutsy answer, Mitch.
Welp, Mitch gave an answer he felt was best to the question, but it’s not like he would have had my vote to begin with anyway.

Ralph William Clark. “I do not believe that the governor should be involved in this decision. Personally, I have enjoyed going to MU-WVU games over the years. (I have not missed a single one!)”

Thanks for the memories, but with that answer there won’t be anymore.
Get a grip, Landon!

Educational, wasn’t it?
No, not at all.

Now, voters can make an informed choice.
Yeah, on MORE PRESSING ISSUES… like the ones I mentioned above. But, we all know Chucky doesn’t mind the $4/gal gas AS LONG AS MARSHALL GETS THEIR CHARITY BOWL EVERY YEAR!!!