Op-Ed: Bill Stewart and his Handpuppet Are Gone

You know what relief smells like? You know that smell? No, I’m not talking about when you sit down in the evening after a big meal and offload a big steaming pile of byproduct right into your…OK, I digress.

Hopefully, now that Ollie Luck is giving Stewart the ol’ heave-ho, we can finally get some relief.

  • Relief from mediocre seasons
  • Relief from blowing our load at the Bowl games
  • Relief from having to deal with a guy and his handpuppet
  • Relief from watching Stewart crap his pants at every press conference
  • Relief from having a Head Coach that always sounds like he is eating Peanut Butter
  • Relief from hearing about Jeff Casteel wanting to leave everytime Bill Stewart craps his pants (yes, the smell is that bad)
  • Relief from having a Don Nehlen prototype running our Football program

That’s a lot of relief. That’s something that even Excedrin can’t tackle. We’ve put up with a lot of headaches over the years. From Rich Rodriguez’s fondling of a cheerleader [rumor, but he did fondle someone to get that job at Michigan], and subsequent “F*ck You!” to the entire State of West Virginia, all while carefully not getting his favorite hot dog chili on that gay pullover he used to wear.

I feel like, at this point, our school has taken a giant collective dump. We’ve been constipated for years, and the laxative is finally doing it’s job.

Thank you, Oliver Luck, for being our prescribed laxative. I know it’s probably not very flattering being compared to someone’s morning constitutions, but let’s be real here: You just got rid of a lot of crap.

I gotta go poopy.

Maybe the above picture is the reason we lost the Gator Bowl. Bill needs to stop drinking so much Metamucil.


Topics: Bill Stewart, Bill Stewart Controversy, Bill Stewart Leak Wvu, Bill Stewart Wvu, Bill Stewart Wvu Fired, Wvu Head Coach Bill Stewart

Want more from Hail WV?  
Subscribe to FanSided Daily for your morning fix. Enter your email and stay in the know.